Saveyourmarriageadvice.com - Practical advice to save troubled marriages
 

After a Break Up

What are the solutions to coping with life after a marriage break up?
After a break upUnfortunately, over 45% of first time marriages in most western countries end in divorce. Some people are able to cope after a break up because it brings relief from an unbearable marital situation. Others of us have difficulty in coming to terms with the loss and change in status...

If you have recently broken up does your to-do list look something like this?:

  • Watch loads of TV
  • Walk the dog
  • Avoid the neighbors
  • Avoid your friends
  • Cry a lot

All these things, and many others are normal responses to feelings of loss after a break up. During the early stages of a separation your actions will be fueled by emotion.

Some relationship break up advice.

If your marriage has irretrievably broken down, then it really doesn't matter who has been the one to walk away at the end of the day. This relationship is now over and matters such as care of children, finances, chattels and property need to be sorted out on a legal basis and then it's time to start a new life.

Don’t ever let your partner make you feel guilty. You’re ready to begin a new phase in your life and it will not include a romantic relationship with your ex. It is best if you retain a positive relationship of some sort with them, but if the relationship has ended for the right reasons then separation is best for both of you.

If you feel you need professional help because you just can't manage surviving a break up on your own then consult a marriage counselor or check out our reviews of the top marriage guides all of which are available as an instant download. In one of these you may very well find the answers you need to help put your life back on track.

When marriage is over.

Conclude ownership and child care matters as quickly as possible then take the opportunity to put yourself back together and start again.

The responsibility of having to cope with these details in the early stages of relationships breaking up is a frightening concept. Try to be positive, let go of self pity and force yourself to engage in activities that will help pull you out of your feelings of emptiness.

Should you ever consider reconnecting?

Does ending a relationship always mean “the end, close the book”?

That is something you have to decide. A good many relationships can be saved after a break up if certain conditions are met. If you have the time and are willing to make the effort, you can get through this period as an even stronger couple.

However, if you are both determined to walk away from your marriage, it’s best to end a relationship with a clean break and move on.

Moving on after a break up.

Just remember that there are always people out there who are going to treat you with love and respect and provide a shoulder for you to cry on.

Take the opportunity to discuss your position with your friends, as and when appropriate. If you feel uncomfortable doing this or with consulting a counselor then there are many support groups out there who are familiar with the trauma of relationship break ups and will gladly take you under their wing and provide you with the emotional support and guidance that you may need.

However don't rely too heavily on any relationship to conquer your feelings of loss or depression.

It is important to understand that others can only provide support and guidance ... the remedy is really in your hands.

It is vitally important that you concentrate on building your confidence and self esteem as early as possible after a break up. Give it time; the sadness of your loss will pass. Happiness, the like you have never known, may be just around the corner.

Break up support

A marriage break up can be almost likened to a death in the family ... it appears so final. The suffering that it causes the parties involved can be quite devastating and may even lead to depression and the inability to deal with any possible future relationship. Many people find it difficult to cope with a break up without professional help, to this end we recommend Amy Waterhouse's "Save My Marriage Today Premium Home Study Course". Your marriage might very well be over, however this guide will provide you with the information and means to get over your break up and move on ... perhaps into a new relationship.

Check it out here: "Save My Marriage Today Premium Home Study Course"

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A selection of messages

Hi Brad & Michelle...
My wife left me just over three months ago and for the last several weeks I have been trying really hard to get her back.
I just wanted you to know that she has now come home and we have made up.
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to all my emails with suggestions and support.
I believe that my following your advice to the letter made all the difference and most definitely led to her change of heart. 
Vic Garrett
Memphis TN
USA

Hello Michelle...
I wonder if you remember the occasion last month when I emailed you about my partner cheating on me?
I have to admit that I was really in a state of shock because we have always had such a great relationship - lots of fun and intimacy. 
He said that he really loved me and that he stupidly just gave in to temptation. 
You pointed me in the right direction and I am very grateful for your advice.
I have now given Ryan another chance to redeem himself. Hopefully he won't let me down again.
Very kind regards
Olivia Jedicke
Brooklyn NY
USA

Dear Brad & Michelle... 
This is short message to let you know that after following your advice Richard and I have patched up our differences.
I know that it is not going to be a smooth ride but we are both keen to start over again and work hard on keeping our family together.
Your help is really appreciated.
Cynthia Gladding
Vancouver BC
Canada

Hi Brad...
When I last emailed you I must admit that I was really quite despondent about whether it was possible for my wife and I to patch up our long standing and quite serious differences.
Thank you for putting me back on track. You made me realize that I was the one at fault and that a total change in attitude was required.
Now my wife says that she can't believe how I have been able to transform myself back into the person that I used to be so many years ago.
I'm so grateful for your help.
Jon Finlayson
Sydney NSW
Aust

Hi Michelle & Brad...
When you emailed me back with your advice on how I should approach the matter of my husband's growing and very concerning indifference to me and the children I must admit that initially I wasn't convinced that your unusual tactic would work.
However I gave it a go and hey presto - what a difference a day makes.
All of a sudden he has opened up to me and we are now back on the same wavelength.
Thanks a million guys.
Linley Whittaker
Auckland
NZ 

Hi Michelle...
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me the encouragement to sort out our marriage issues.
I've got to say that it has been an uphill struggle but I think that we are getting there at last.
James has even suggested that we go away for a romantic break.- I didn't think that he had a romantic bone left in his body. The change in his attitude is utterly amazing.
Thank you once again.
Holly Wilding
Tallahassee FL
USA
  


 

 

 

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